SMARTER Accountability Questions & Agreements

A Guide for Men's Groups

by Mark D. Worthen, Psy.D.

Tags: accountability questions, smarter, acountability questions for men, shadow, jung

Synopsis 

This article presents a model for making clear, realistic, and growth-enhancing accountability commitments in men's groups. The questions listed herein are modifications of the SMARTER goal-setting guidelines.

The examples and descriptions I use in this article are primarily derived from my experience in ManKind Project men's groups.

Introduction

The accountability questions listed below are used to insure that a man's commitment will help him grow and change in a manner consistent with his life mission.

SMARTER is an acronym that stands for Specific, Measurable, Acceptable,Realistic, Time Frame, Extending, Rewarding.

In the context of a men's group, when a man makes a commitment that meets all of the SMARTER criteria, he will almost always derive significant benefit from successful completion of the commitment.

In contrast, if a man says he will do something but describes his proposed action in vague, fuzzy, unrealistic terms, he's not making a commitment at all.

In fact, the following accountability questions will help you avoid consciously or unconsciously making a pseudo-commitment.


The SMARTER Accountability Questions

Therefore, when making a commitment to your men's group, ask yourself, "Is my commitment___________________?" (fill in the blank with the SMARTER criteria listed below).

For example, the first accountability question would be "Is my commitment specific?"

S - Specific- If your commitment is vague, ask yourself if you really want to make this commitment. Are you people-pleasing? If your desire to get back into integrity is sincere, make your commitment very specific.

Not specific: "I'll do something creative for the group."

Specific: "I will create an original 11" x 8" water color that illustrates the wound behind this shadow."

M - Measurable- If you can't measure it, how can you hold yourself accountable?

Not measurable: I'll think about this shadow and maybe do some work on it next week.

Measurable: I will write every day in my journal for a minimum of five minutes about this shadow. I claim 25 minutes to do work around (examine; increase awareness of) this shadow during group next week.

A - Acceptable - Is my proposed commitment acceptable to me? Be honest with yourself--don't propose a punishing task.

Some groups include a proposed "act of service" in their self-accountability process. If you propose an act of service to "get back in integrity" (because you did not keep a previous commitment), is your proposed act acceptable to the group? If one or more of the men in your group don't think your proposed act of service is meaningful, you'll want to understand why and, if you agree, modify your proposal.
If you first check your idea for an act of service against all of these SMARTER accountability questions, chances are much better that the men in your group will accept your proposal.

R - Realistic - The act of service should be a stretch (see "Extending" below) and it should not be so taxing that it will cause more harm than good (similar to the idea of acceptability).

Not Realistic: "I will write a 150 page short story around this shadow and have it published in Asimov's Science Fiction next month."

Realistic: "I will write a 3-page short story exemplifying how this shadow corrodes my character and read it in group next week."

T - Time frame - Is the time allotted to complete your act of service realistic, specific, and time-limited? Commitments should not drag on forever.

Vague time frame: "I will host a poker party when we can get together."

Specific, realistic time frame: "I will email each of you tomorrow with proposed dates for a poker party that I will host. I will inform each of you of the exact day and time by Friday at 12 noon."

E - Extending - The behavioral change I propose should require effort and a certain degree of discomfort. It's analogous to weight training: If I want to increase my strength and stamina, I must push myself by regularly increasing the weight, repetitions, or sets. stretch for me.

R - Rewarding - If I choose an action that is a stretch, it will ultimately be rewarding. And, the process of getting back in integrity with the men in my group is rewarding in and of itself.

The Jungian Concept of "Shadow"

The term shadow or Shadow refers to a concept developed by psychoanalyst Carl Gustav Jung. See quotes from Jung's published writings, which discuss the Shadow archetype and the functioning of this largely unconscious aspect of the human mind.

The more you understand the role and function of the Shadow archetype, the more energized, free, and powerful you will be.

If you are interested in learning more about this topic, I highly recommend these two books:

Owning Your Own Shadow: Understanding the Dark Side of the Psyche by Robert A. Johnson

A Little Book on the Human Shadow by Robert Bly


Author

Mark Worthen is the father of three incredible kids. He lives in Park City, Utah. After 26 years in the mental health field, Mark answered the entrepreneurial call and now runs his own Internet-based sales, advertising, and consulting business.

Mark has been an active member of the ManKind Project (MKP) since November 2000. The ManKind Project is a nonprofit, international men's organization, committed to embracing diversity, and not affiliated with any religious organization. Men in MKP seek to live with accountability, integrity, and service to others.


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SMARTER Accountability Questions and Agreements


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SMARTER Accountability Questions and Agreements by Mark D. Worthen, Psy.D. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.